#56 The Trouser Variations 45

"The Trouser Variations" is a levels check recording. Just when everything is first plugged in and ready to go. Then it all starts. The guitars duel like alien overlords and it's all properly mixed later. This is actually takes one and two. Takes three through five weren't as "inspired" and are now in the leftovers bin. "Riding With Don Quixote's Brother-In-Law" is a highly conceptual non-fiction piece, largely about hanging in the desert on peyote. The ever present background noise comes from the desert itself. You'd be surprised how noisy that place is on drugs. You can hear Al Quixote doing his tour guide thing in the background. Notice how the whole jam seems to teeter right on the brink of everything breaking down, almost from the very start.

Listen

A - The Trouser Variations (7:52)
B - Riding With Don Quixote's Brother-In-Law (6:09) 

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#55 The Last Countdown 45

We had an elaborate story prepared for "The Last Countdown," recalling our days as an opening act, and one night in particular with Screamin' Jay Hawkins. The police were called, but since we were minors at the time our collective records have since been expunged. There are details, but no one reads this anyway, so why bother? We revisited our demo making past with "Tomorrow In March (Jim Carroll Dropped By)." What days those were - before we decided to go strictly live and unrehearsed - when guys like Jim Carroll would drop by and regale us with his perspective. Digitally, anyway. The hallucinational chasers helped a bit, too.

Listen

A - The Last Countdown (6:45)
B - Tomorrow In March (Jim Carroll Dropped By) (4:23) 

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Another fun video from our pal, Capo. Mucho thanks.

#54 Metal Machine Music 45

Metal Machine Music, Parts V & VI were originally part of a longer live session in Mark's basement. The plan was to do two, 16 minute takes and create the missing 3rd LP of Metal Machine Music, but even we couldn't stand it after awhile, so it's a sure bet you won't be able to stand it either. Instead, we re-considered the idea's commercial viability and called it a 45 instead. Good luck.

Listen

A - Metal Machine Music, Part V (5:24)
B - Metal Machine Music, Part VI (7:40) 

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#53 I Wanna Be Your Man 45

Most people aren’t aware that Lennon & McCartney's "I Wanna Be Your Man" is actually a re-write of an old blues tune of the same name. “Blind somebody” recorded it in the early 1950s, and collectors know of a few records out there that have survived. A sure clue that it's not a Lennon/McCartney original is illustrated by how seriously John & Paul treated the song. For a larf, they pawned it off on The Rolling Stones (theories abound that it was a blatant attempt to derail their career). But, Lennon & McCartney ended up laughing even louder at the bank when the Stones accidentally had their first hit single with it. Then... they gave the song to Ringo to sing - a sure sign of something, to be sure. But because copyright laws were so loose in the 1960s, "I Wanna Be Your Man" has long been considered just another old, co-opted blues tune that got ‘borrowed’ and goosed-up by a band of upper-poppin' punks with a Merseyside beat. Hey, they were kids, what did they know? So, we stripped the song back to its original Mississippi blues roots, then gave it to David Barratt, from The Beatles Compete On Ukulele, who edited it and added some blues uke. The first version is our original mono master, and the flip is Dave's edited & dubbed version. This is why we don't do vocals. Consider yourself warned.

Listen

A - I Wanna Be Your Man (Mono Master) (3:04)
B - I Wanna Be Your Man (Edited/Dubbed By David Barratt) (2:43)

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#52 Clash On Broadway 45

Green Day's on Broadway. How much would you have lost on that bet? So... this is from our Clash On Broadway Original Cast Soundtrack, which doesn't actually exist. Truth is, the idea is thinly stretched even as a 45. It's the rags-to-riches story of a gang of hard workin' British punks, finally making it to The Big Apple... and Broadway. But, having to sell their souls in the process. "Clash On Broadway (Revolutionary Go-Go Dance Club Scene Rehearsal)" also doubles as the flashy dance number that every successful Broadway show must have to fill seats. The rest of the show will write itself, one day. The flip side is a mind-numbing Faustian romp captured live in Mark's basement. It was originally created to sell to the military - to blast at high decibels at troublemakers holed up in hideouts or embassies. But, it was deemed too toxic for our own troops to handle and administer. We're still trying to get a government contract, since the music industry doesn't offer any good ones anymore.

Listen

A - Clash On Broadway (Revolutionary Go-Go Dance Club Scene Rehearsal) (2:30)
B - Thunderpud (Live At Mark's) (6:59)

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#51 Dark Side Of The Shrooms

Journal, dated 6/13: The Kings of Monotony. Diminishing Returns. Drug specific sessions are interesting. A few strangers on this one. Why is everyone chuckling so much? Justification. Notice time. Here's what we did with ours. This sounds like a soundtrack to an East Berlin spaghetti western. Guess we've lost our charm. #50 only had one comment... and it was an ad. First one here will probably be a complaint. Time to go commercial? Start sucking up and playing the game? How about a faux gatefold cover, instead? Download for free or just give a listen. Recorded live.

Listen

The Air In Another Country (Soundtrack To An East Berlin Spaghetti Western) (11:00)
Swimming With Sharks (5:12)
Him Tome (4:32)

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Big thanks to Capo (aka OmletteDaggle) for the cool vid & kind words.

#50 THEM!

Imagine a superior race of insect beings taking over the Earth. From another world, perhaps, or, more likely, a gruesome result of the atomic experiments of the '40's and '50's. It began with biologically impossible ants, but the mutation and advanced intelligence quickly spread to other insects, including everything from flies to dung beetles. What will happen? Chaos? Peace? Extinction? Interspecies love? Guess it's up to you... and you... and you! Recorded live.

Listen

Wind/Attack #11 (0:59) 
Twin Towers (6:40)
THEM! (2:37)
Screw You (4:45)
Muy Legs (Tempo) (4:34)
Interspecies Love (& The Ghost Of Carlos Santana's Conga Player)(4:24) 

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Thanks to Capo (aka OmletteDaggle) for the muy cool video.

#49 Adventures In Krautrock: A Tribute To Faust

We've stolen from Faust before. This time we're getting away with it by calling it "a tribute." Goes to show that, with a little word play, you too can skirt tedious legal issues like a pro. This one's bound to piss off our German buddies, though. After all... what do we know? We generate some kind of brutal, head-pounding, migraine of monotony, call it Krautrock and we're suddenly worthy? Don't see it. Truth is, we had already decided not to post this mid-April session, but we got stoned last weekend and cued it up and deemed it no crappier than our other posts, so why not? This is the product of pizza-hydration. When the delivery guy screws up and takes all night to deliver sustenance, begging not to make him go back for fresh ones for fear of losing his job. What are you gonna do? Cold pizza's OK. The guy was stoned. Another 19 minutes you can't get back. Recorded live.

Listen

The Train Station At Düsseldorf (6:52) 
Adventures In Krautrock (2:42)
Into Infinity (Sans Commentary) (9:22) 

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#48 Static Room

We primarily record in four places, two of which, for neighborly relations, require a volume controlled, direct-to-board, juiced & triggered drum kit. One of them is The Static Room. You'll hear how it got named. The interaction is live, though, if severely edited, and has something for everyone; dreary, totalitarian, migraine-inducing beats, clearly agitated dead spirit guitars, a nightmarish private eye subplot and enough Soviet-era space effects to render any lingering point moot. Urb Up! Recorded live.

Listen
The Pusher (Instrumental) (4:30)
40 Minutes To Zero (Live In The Static Room) (5:36)
Point Of Anatomy (Live In The Static Room) (10:18) 

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#47 We're Late For Class Presents: The Act You've Known For All These Years (A Mash)

Destined to be our first deleted release. This is a psychedelic mash-up using only tracks from The Beatles' experimental solo releases. Every sound you'll hear is The Beatles (or, more accurately, from their solo albums). No sounds have been added by us. Since they never made an experimental album together, a future press release should wildly claim, "The Beatles - As You've Never Heard Them Before!" If only they'd all just gotten along. That's the premise, anyway. Originally made for our amusement, we figured, hey... why not share it? Link back to us and we'll whisper your name in bonged reverence & dedicate a bowl to your existence. When our species comes to rule this planet, your name will be on the protected rolls and you will come to no harm. 

Listen

Space Fantasy Peace (Intro) (1:18)
Real Made Up (7:06)
Ski-ing/Au (3:15)
Mersey Silence Movement 1 (Overture) (5:10)
Greasy Leaf Changes (9:52)
You Can't Fight Virgins In A Dream (7:00)
It's So Hard To Hope For Peace In A Spiral (Requiem) (13:34)
Goodnight Sad Ramsterdam (3:44)
John, Yoko Is My Madness (Hidden Track) (19:02)

  The Reviews Are In... 
"...we at Ask Fred are glad WLFC exist" - MOJO
"If only they'd all just gotten along." - We're Late For Class
"...finely wrought, melancholy character studies" - NØ
"The 13 minute Lennon epic, 'It's So Hard To Hope For Peace In A Spiral (Requiem),' is an impassioned anti-war cry from the grave." - Earl
"The greatest Beatles mash up of all time." - Never Get Out Of The Boat
"A rather boring and sentimentally self conscious effort from a Face(less)book act soon to be forgotten on the horizon of last decade." - Anonymous Guy 
"...sure to go down in music history in the category of 'required listening.'" - Elementary Penguin
"Best Free Beatles Mash-up of Jan 2010!" - Astral Headspace
"Clever stunt yields intriguing results!!" - Astral Headspace (The real quote)
"Luv it! Luv it! Luv it!" - Casey, The College Crowd Digs Me
"...download it as soon as possible" - homemade lofi psych
"...a trip into the dark twisted world of The Beatles alternate reality..."- Omlette Dangle 
"To say it transcends the original works is an understatement and may make me eligible for the "Master of the Obvious" award..." - mick55  

The pre-law guys insist we say that no money changed hands for these reviews. Thanks for all the totally manufactured opinions. Now that you're a newly published/certified music critic, you've got a virtual license to "download for review purposes." Please consult your attorney. 

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#46 A Hundred On The Hyena

Another 23 minute manifesto of improvisation, made up on the spot, never to be played again. If not for the tape recorders, it would be just like this stuff never happened. You’re invited to experience something the remainder of the planet will never, ever hear. Something that, by all rights, shouldn't even exist... or should have dissipated in the air seconds after it took place. Something that record companies already know in advance they’d lose money on. We are We’re Late For Class! Noisemakers who don’t want your money. Improvisers with no ulterior motive for fame. Layabouts lacking the secret desire for padded riders filled with quarts of Jack, spare tube socks and roast beef heavy backstage deli trays (well... the roast beef would be nice). A gang of pot smoking, acid dropping, ecstasy driven misfits who do this... because. Recorded live.

Listen

Stanley's Sun Ra Conga Line Experience (7:09)
A Hundred On The Hyena (6:30)
Les Hallucinations de Shackleton (9:31)
Jazz Interlude (0:33)

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#45 The Stalker 45

The first scene of the pilot episode of The Stalker is set inside a car parked in a dark, desolate, wooded area. One dumb guy and one dumb girl are wrestling in the front seat. Flashbacks are fast and furious; late night hang-ups, phantom doorbells, cars keeping a certain distance behind. Every episode the dumb guy, Ronnie, runs into your every day stalker-related calamities; dog bites, getting roughed up by flashlight wielding Neighborhood Watch guys, reimbursing people for damaged flower beds... there are new adventures every week. Ha! You just can't make this stuff up. At show's end, Ronnie eventually feels the girl up, but that's as far as he gets. The flip side of this digital 45 is the show's elaborate theme music, which plays under the credits. The Quinn/Martin reference harkens back to #11 The Quinn/Martin Quartet Offensive …Tonight's Episode: Dick Gunn.

Listen

The Stalker (Ronnie Don't) (4:00) 
The Stalker (Main Titles) (7:14)

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#44 Solar Musik

The Legend of the Vanishing Washington: Three stoned musicians go to a motel to sleep off a bender. The clerk says the room is $30, so each guy chips in a $10 bill and they all stumble up to their room. After a while, the clerk suddenly remembers, 'Hey, we have a $25 Musician's Special.' So he calls the bellhop over and gives him a $5 refund to take up to the room. On the way up in the elevator, the bellhop thinks to himself, 'Those guys were wasted, they'll never know. I'll just give each of the three guys a dollar back, so they'll have only paid $9 each for their room, and I'll keep $2 for myself.' Which he does, even though they were too smashed to care. So, in the end, the musicians (who each got a buck back) paid $27 ($9 x 3 guys) and the bellhop kept $2 for himself. $27 + $2 = $29. Thus... The Legend of the Vanishing Washington. Recorded live.

Listen

Landings On Moons Besides Our Own (5:17) 
Flying (4:34)
Solar Musik (In Analog) (5:16) 
Instrument Of Art (5:23)

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#43 The LSD Journals, Vol. II

On June 6, just after recording our last mind-numbingly lengthy epic, #42 The LSD Journals Of Dr. Jackson Gamble, we took a smoke break to listen back, a favored ritual around these parts. Some folks stopped by, so we smoked and listened back some more. Then some others came over and we started another round. Thus, we were righteously blitzed when deciding to take another stab at The LSD Journals. After arduous mixing, "Chapter 2" is the result ("Chapter 3" is a Martian version). Thanks to Will C., without whom. Also included: an indoctrination-free, instrumental version for those that like it raw (or don't buy #42's premise in the first place). It's live.

Listen

The LSD Journals: Chapter 2 (14:45) 
The LSD Journals: Chapter 3 (6:35)
The LSD Journals: Chapter 2 Again? (Instrumental) (14:45)

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#42 The LSD Journals Of Dr. Jackson Gamble

Shipwrecked on an uncharted island, Dr. Jackson Gamble begins to experiment with mind expansion. Until he is rescued, nearly a year later, Dr. G. kept detailed journals of his experiences with a wide variety of plants he was consuming, including Yoto, a hallucinogen the native Polynesians used for spiritual ceremonies and sacred bloodletting. The Doc was zoned on this stuff for eight straight months and these are his thoughts and exploits. "It was Oriental women such as I have never known," he was once heard to mutter. Another 19 minutes you can never get back. Recorded live.

Listen

The LSD Journals Of Dr. Jackson Gamble (19:00)

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#41 Sheep Watch

At a military-run bio-engineering facility, a duty roster emphasizes just one rule of caution, "Whatever you do, whatever you hear... don't look into their eyes." Of course, to move the plot forward, a stoner security guard fails to heed that rule and mayhem ensues. Engineered sheep first infest your dreams. Then, behavioral changes will occur under their watchful, nay, judgmental eye. After that... well, we'll save the exciting Quinn Martin finale for the script negotiations with Roger Corman. In reality, the title track is just another in a series of cheap re-writes of "Careful With That Axe, Eugene." "Capt. Hapi" really only has a sheep theme if all you equator-crossers out there want it to. In the meantime, we've resurrected the classic gatefold album cover for stoners to stare at while listening. If Giles, Giles & Fripp had used this cover you'd have thought they were geniuses. Recorded live.

Listen

Sheep Watch (Don't Look Into Their Eyes) (6:46) 
Sheep Watch (Reprise & Fade) (2:07) 
Capt. Hapi Crosses The Equator (7:50) 
Sheep Watch (Variation) (3:29)

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#40 Another Collection

Another Collection is 2-CDs, 142 minutes, of uncharted improvisation and drug fueled excess, including a seance with Jim Morrison, a musical romp with O.J. Simpson, a homage to producer Jimmy Miller, the theme song for a low budget cable comedy sketch show, one too many accidental nods to Hawkwind and stoned tributes to Ali, Guess Who guitarist Kurt Winter, Pink Floyd and whatever else was on our minds that weekend. It's all here, from a college stoner perspective, of course, culled from previous posts #21-#39. We didn't have room for our 20 to 30 minute jams, but those aren't hard to find. It's all free, so we've done all we can do. Spread the word, tell your pals, post our album for your readers if you'd like... just stop placating us! We're not going away. In fact, #41 is all ready to go. As with our first collection (#20 A Collection), we've got a nifty, state-of-the-art, future-of-online-album art, animated .gif cover. When Kings Of Leon get around to doing it, it might be considered cool.


Listen

Disc 1 
Herd Mentality (3:05) #23 
Low Budget Cable Sketch Comedy Show Instrumental Theme Song (2:48) #38 
Transmission From Jimmy Miller's Car Phone (6:46) #24 
Ali Ali (4:57) #27 
Under 30 Second Tribute To Kurt Winter (0:29) #21 
Lab Animal (3:16) #21 
Checkers (5:42) #23 
Wind Of The Hawk (4:20) #28 
67 (4:23) #31 
The Lumbering Rex (Remix) (5:05) #32 
Pattern Of Abuse (7:32) #34 
Universal Cardigan (Live At Pompeii) (9:08) #38 
Dirge Experience (In Easter Hay) (5:31) #38 
Buttery Hog Mosh (8:49) #31 

Disc 2 
Sequel To The Return Of The Son of Monster Magnet (11:00) #28 
The Premiere & Final Performance of Jazz From Outer Space (10:31) #35 
Liquidity (The Spastic Conductor) (11:25) #33 
The Jim Morrison Seance Tapes (13:57) #30 
Trippin' In A Plymouth Belvedere (10:25) #32 
Particle Alert (12:55) #35 

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or... Free 320 (Both Parts Together) Pts 1 & 2
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#39 Opium Den Express

When every minute equals an hour... you're on the Opium Den Express. It runs parallel to the old Ho Chi Minh trail, through Laos, for about 22-1/2 hours. Say nothing, steer clear of the chickens and nestle into one of the back births for the chill experience. The vibrating track pulses with the rhythmic monotony of a non-stop train (a 'heroin gate'), offering hallucinations and plenty of time & space to develop your own plot lines. Think of it as a Spaghetti Eastern. For Broadway, it'll require an Agatha Christie-style murder mystery to fill seats. For now, a few bong hits will do. Recorded live.

Listen

Opium Den Express (22:21)

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#38 The Dirge Experience

We had planned to do a whole album of an alter-ego group, The Dirge Experience... 60s holdouts with white-boy afros, black session sidemen and a credo, In Dirge We Trust. "Dirge Experience (In Easter Hay)," is the band's signature song, which they insist must never be covered by any other artist after they die (especially their own kids). Will it be a fiery plane wreck or a slow, endless succession of OD's and suicides, where one mediocre bassist is left with all the trademarks? As for "Low Budget Cable Sketch Comedy Show Instrumental Theme Song," imagine a spunky, 10 second loop underneath a blurry montage of the latest troupe of hip, irreverent cable comics. "Universal Cardigan (Live At Pompeii)" is us pompously grandstanding against the backdrop of ancient Roman ruins, minus the gong. It's so cosmic, perhaps you should save it for an eclipse or something. Recorded live.

Listen

Low Budget Cable Sketch Comedy Show Instrumental Theme Song (2:48)
Dirge Experience (In Easter Hay) (5:31) 
Universal Cardigan (Live At Pompeii) (9:08)  

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#37 Live In The Theatre Of DisBelief II

Live In The Theatre Of DisBelief II is our second episode of mind-numbingly random, alien transmissions encountered by the intergalactic scientific deep-space probe, Trace. Episode 2 comes with a plot development unmentioned when Episode 1 (#22 Live In The Theatre Of DisBelief) was released earlier... EAC's (Embedded Addiction Codes). Meaning, casual listeners aboard the ship were unaware they were slowly becoming mentally dependent on the transmission's subliminally embedded helix re-organizer. The plot thickens, as they say. Settle in and toke up for another non-musical, 26 minute improvisational dose of seemingly benign space racket. We're concealing the show's exciting, climatic, professional, prime-time TV conclusion until negotiations get us a graphic novel anime to score. Recorded live, during sessions that included #35 Jazz From Outer Space.

Listen

Live In The Theatre Of DisBelief - Episode 2 (26:19)

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