#84 THE AVANT GUARD White Noise System

THE AVANT GUARD… Your Defense Against The Un-Avantful!

Therapeutically speaking, the WHITE NOISE SYSTEM might be precisely what you need to cure your numerous ills and ailments. Played LOW, this 55-minute gestation of pure, uncut, pre-street, white noise will mask bedtime sounds to give you a good night's sleep. But, it can even be used for sharpening your senses. Played LOUD, your faculties will reel at the imagination’s unlimited absurdity. As the static energy pulsates, your brain will attempt to make sense of it all. You’ll think you’re hearing voices, patterns, noises, howling animals, alien communication and wildly non-sensical conspiracy theories. If you experiment by altering the volume levels of the WHITE NOISE SYSTEM, you’ll discover a plethora of differing results. We’ve also thoughtfully included a UK Bonus Track, "White Noise System (30m)," just for collectors... or the certifiable.

“Yeah, but… does it work?,” the skeptic in you might ask. Well, you can take our word for it (ahem). Just pay no heed to the FDA, since we were too broke to pay the necessary fees for government approval. Heck… the fascists even demanded our names before allowing us to make “unsubstantiated medical claims” on the web, can you believe that?

Besides, it will only cost you a click to find out for yourself (which, coincidentally, shields us from any prosecutorial fraud charges). However, being the kind of ardent collector we know you are - boasting unquestionable pedigree, refined tastes and at least one respectable pair of shoes - you could opt for the high quality FLAC, WAV or AIFF versions of WHITE NOISE SYSTEM available via Bandcamp or the streaming players. By the way, our lawyers have memo-ed us that we need to state, up-front, that anyone experiencing any unusual occurrences after listening to the WHITE NOISE SYSTEM - like waking up behind the wheel of a car going 85mph; clucking like a chicken whenever you drive past a fast food joint; or suddenly deciding to rob a bank and anonymously laundering the money though our Bandcamp account - we, THE AVANT GUARD, can not be held liable for your actions.

FYI: No surviving members of The Velvet Underground were harmed during the making of this release.


“White Noise System (55m)” (55:00)
“White Noise System (30m)” (30:00) (UK Bonus Track)

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